I am a Parent

As parents, it is natural to try and protect our children from our unfortunate mistakes and want them to lead happy lives. Sadly, the statistics of children who come from a Broken Home or Split Family prove however that without careful guidance of all the challenges this can bring, our children are five times more likely to be poor; more likely to drop out of school early; more likely to be in trouble with the law and more likely to become teen parents; more likely to become divorced themselves; and finally as a result of all this, they are more likely to die before the average age from ill health. These are the facts and these facts are part of the emotional agony we feel when we face parenting within a Complex Family.

Life has changed for us - and our children - regardless of whether we left the relationship, or were the one being left. Although the way we navigate our way through the change, and handle the relationship with the ex, will be fundamentally different depending on who made that choice to go, ultimately the impact on the children can be very similar.

If we were left, knowing about these facts fuels our anger further. Often feelings such as ʻHow dare our Ex inflict such pain upon our precious family through their selfish behaviour?!ʼ become common. The great divide between us and them, with the children falling smack bang in the middle, can then open up further while adding to our justifiable blame, hatred and lifelong resentments.

If we left, hearing about such facts can confirm a belief that our unique circumstances justified our decision to go, at least partly 'for the sake of the kids'. As well as believing that our own happiness will improve, we may tell them they will have a better life too, in order to compensate for their loss. So when our kids are struggling, which they almost always do at some point after the split, we can be at risk of quickly pointing the blaming finger at our Ex for their ʻpoisonous influenceʼ, again increasing the divide and leaving our kids stuck in the middle.

History shows us that the majority of us who are in a Complex Family often find it hard to forgive or accept what life has thrown our way, but instead we become worn-down, or fed-up with the now familiar and predictable irritation that our Ex provides. Although we hope for normality to return, our reactions to others within the Complex Family can simply keep the irritations going, or even make them worse.

Complex Family Foundation walks the journey with you. We help you to move from under the grey cloud of being Broken or Split, where subtly we believe something needs to be fixed or made whole again, moving forward as a Complex Family instead. A place where our children have every opportunity to excel in happiness, health and wealth. Where we can move beyond our separation, to a place where it becomes an event that had an impact on our life, but we are free from complicated emotions.

We offer tailor-made programs and memberships to Complex Family parents. We recognise it takes time, tools and great love to raise our children - and letʼs face it - we can all do with some support along the way. We provide convenient, affordable, relevant and meaningful support to you...

So, which one fits your situation?

I separated fairly recently...

I separated years ago...